Dear Sleep – I have never craved anything more in my entire life. Have me or let me have you. I need a decent amount of you as a matter of urgency. My sanity depends on it.
Dear Snow- Can you fall in abundance tonight so we can get a snow day tomorrow please? Because it’s been decades since the Boss has taken pity on us and told us to stay home.
Dear Boss – One day’s closure won’t kill us. Live a little please.
Dear Dark – I think I only like you during the day. At night, you scare me a little. You drag me to places I don’t want to go.
Dear Future Husband – You took the piss and now I am 30. Well done. I hope you’re at least making plenty of money so I can retire at 40. This is a joke. But be funny and light hearted I beg you. I need some lols in my life right now.
Dear Car- I don’t exhaust you, stop exhausting me. I am skint.
Dear Book Publishing World – ya’ll need my words in your life, take me innit.
Dear Camera – why you no inspire me anymore?
Dear Travel – I’m sorry we had to break up. We were really good together but the financial situation had to come and split us up didn’t it? Hater.
Dear Tutee – please cancel today’s lesson coz honestly, I cba.
Dear 5:39am friends – thank you.