1. Cough syrup is fookin’ useless.
2. Chai in bed can vastly improve even the worst of my moods.
3. There is such a thing as being too honest.
4. Being good is
fucking hard but it will benefit you when you are 6 feet under. As will not swearing I suppose. But you know.
5. A stranger is the best person to talk to. But we really mustn’t speak to strangers. Note to self; stop doing this.
6. Being kind is everything.
7. The only person that will love you regardless of what a wasteman you turned out to be is your mother. God bless mine, I am her proudest disappointment. Mashallah me.
8. Even if you do what you love, it will still feel like work because Monday.
9. Humans were designed to betray whereas animals show you undying loyalty. Except reptiles, they evil. And my cat, she hates me.
10. The idea of love is beautiful. The actual ish is hella complex.
11. Health is one of those things you should stop taking for granted.
12. Being lonely is a thing. Even if you love being alone.
13. Not everyone you want to be in your life will want to be there
because they think they are prestiege oh my actual days.
14. Thirty is a good time to start practising minimalism and (almost) zero waste as actual lifestyles. Here goes nothing.
15. Just like “money doesn’t buy you happiness,” love doesn’t put food on the table. So when da mandem be’s saying, “even the Sahabas weren’t rich!” – Bruh, in what other way are you a Sahabi though? Pft. Have several seats.
16. Time doesn’t heal, it teaches you to survive anyway.
17. The Casanova that listened to his mother and left you because you were “dark” and therefore “unattractive”? You lost him but you gained perspective. Also, he’s bald now, whereas your hair game is hella strong mashallah.
18. Life is kinder to attractive people. It won’t be you that changes that ridiculous notion so bite your tongue and iron your bloody scarf once in a while.
19. Take the photo. So someone tells you off. Big deal.
20. If you treat people like celebrities, they will treat you like a fan. No one is that great. No one.
21. Not everyone will like you. Even if you are super nice to them.
22. Ain’t nobody gonna see the good in you if you don’t acknowledge it 1st.
23. People that offer to drive are good people.
24. Tastes like acid in my mouth to admit this but… marriage isn’t all bad *chokes*
25. Le future other half? He has to speak English. But it helps his case majorly if he speaks another language as well. Like big time. Like help me Lord.
26. Today’s friend can unfortunately soon become tomorrow’s “who?” Don’t form unnecessary attachments.
27. Decluttering is life. Get rid of everything. Be sentimental in your heart.
28. Knowing a list of facts about someone doesn’t mean you know them. It’s the things you figure out without being told that count.
29. Real talk? The opposite sex only holds as much control over you as you allow them to. You are in charge of distributing the bullets responsible for your demise. Hand them out sparingly. He will not think twice about shooting.
30. It’s okay that the most peaceful you feel right now is sitting in your car alone (with food, always) listening to soppy songs and staring at the epic view you parked in front of, whilst mentally pretending you are in a music video. You do you.