Not to be confused with attachment to Vimto, which I am guessing many of you, particualrly if you’re Arab, suffer from this month. I’m also guessing that that’s all anyone will get from this post; that I am attached to Vimto. But I shall give ya’ll the benefit of the doubt and proceed anyway.
-Vimto is the the number one drink that is consumed during Ramadan in the Arab world, and when I say consumed I mean in abundance and when I say Vimto I mean the asli one they sell in Arab countries… not the anaemic mess found on the shelves of Tesco.
-The orginal Vimto is hella concentrated and hella red, as you would know if you have had the misfortune of breaking a bottle of it and getting it in the neck from your angry mother.
-All the above, paired with the fact that you need a lot of sugar to make this beverage drinkable leads me to conclude that Arabic Vimto is bad for you and yet we still crave it’s comfort after an 18.5 hour fast. We are attached to it… which leads me to my next point…
-Attachment is a female dog. I’m not against cussing, but I am trying to make a special effort for the Holy month. Mashallah me.
-Time, and time again, we get told not to attach ourselves to anyone or anything wordly. Because this dunya is fragile. It’s not just the deen that tells us not to attach ourselves to anything wordly, psychologists, sociologists, poets all warn us against this too.
-What do we go and do though? We attach and get attached. We latch ourselves onto the first source of comfort we want to be around. Not always as a recipient, sometimes as a provider as well. This is what I like to call the hero complex.
-I have a serious case of the hero complex. I always think I can save people in need. Which is the stupidest notion in the world wallah. I need saving myself so how the hell am I going to save anyone?
-My life is a constant battle not to attach or get attached to anyone or anything in the dunya. I get frequent reminders about this from life that I don’t heed because I am human I suppose and I was designed in a way that makes me crave attachment in most it’s forms.
-I guess the only way to break the chain of long term + attachment = pain is to eliminate the element of expectation from the equation. Deny it all you want, but we all expect something in return when we invest in someone or something. You work because good work ethic sure but the wage slip helps. It doesn’t always have to be a reward though. Expectation can sometimes purely be not being rejected or abandoned.
-I invest in people a lot. My time, my energy, my emotions literally anything I have, I give. My mother says this is my major weakness by the way. So when people turn around and they either reject it all or leave after they have bled me dry, I just look at them and think… but all that time though…? You can walk away but what about me? I’m in too deep, you can’t leave me now…
(Are you thinking #issues yet?)
-You mourn the time you wasted on that activity or person. And you swear you would never get attached to anything in this fragile dunya again. But then of course…sigh.
-I’d like to end this rant with a reminder to myself; “You cannot guide whom you love, but Allah guides whomever he pleases.” [28:56] Ergo, you can try and make someone see the light until you are blue in the face. If they insist on being blind you and Specsavers have a snowball’s chance in hell of changing that. Just pray for them.
-And… people leave us all the time, regardless of promises, who we are and what we meant to them once upon a time, the chance of abandonment and drifting apart is huge because life… So, self preservation is key. After Allah, you only have you. It feels horrible not being able to fall back on anyone and to have this constant void where you want a shoulder to lean on, but take comfort from the fact that we were born alone and we die alone… everyone that comes into our life in between is but a visitor and visiting times inevitably come to an end.
-Have a blessed rest of the month.