Go on… it only takes a minute and it feels kindda good after.
I am going through a YouTube videos phase these days. You will often catch me making jokes about becoming a YouTuber on my blog too. Something appeals to me about it but I lack the confidence, time and ideas to see it through. Still, perhaps one day.
Moving on, I came across a pretty good video that I liked today, I will link it for your viewing pleasure somewhere on here. It involved a YouTuber giving strangers a Dollar for their story.
The idea was fascinating to me because I do sometimes catch myself thinking; I wish I can talk to someone right now who actually wanted to listen to me. By God’s grace, I do have some people in my life who fulfil that criteria. But sometimes, in the interest of not burdening them too, I stay quiet and that is where this avenue comes in handy.
I have been desperate and stuck for something to write about for a couple of weeks now and was thus inspired by Kareem’s idea for a post. I can’t give you a Dollar for your story, but I can read it and cherish that you shared it with me. The risk of course being we are a closed up culture as a whole and maybe no one wants to share their inner deep thoughts.
It can be something light too though, or something funny, or inspirational. Whatever floats your boat really. Share it down below. I don’t have enough of a follower base for this to be wildly successful, but we will not worry about that too much just yet.
In the interest of fairness, I will share something first; a small part of me. I wish it could be cheerful, but in the mood I am in right now…. #leSigh
I am a notorious people pleaser, I have lived my entire life pleasing others. Honestly, I don’t know if it is a culture thing or a self-esteem thing or both, but I am (sadly) forever looking for someone to be proud of me, be it my mother or my boss or a friend. It doesn’t even have to be someone superior to me, I have longed to be accepted by people younger, less “powerful” -for lack of a better word- than myself.
Every year, I tell myself I will no longer be this person that craves to be accepted and every year, I fail at this resolution even more than the previous year. The positives of being someone who always seeks for others’ approval is that you are a peace maker and you are not confrontational per se.
The negatives are when you don’t get this approval, you sink into this unforgiving pit of depression that is seriously difficult to resurface from. People don’t seem to understand why you let yourself succumb to such nonesense and immediately demand yiu cut the crap and bounce back from it.
Honestly, that’s like telling a French person to suddenly become Japanese. It ain’t happening. That said, I am currently in the proccess of teaching myself that you can be the juiciest and ripest peach in the world but there will STILL be a certain sector of people that loath peaches for no rhyme or reason and that I just have to learn to be ok with that.
I am looking forward to a day where I no longer care about the negatives that people think / associate with me. But more importantly, I am trying to learn not to crave other people’s approval like my life depends on it.
Also, I need to lose this hero (or heroine) complex that I seem to have developed of late where I expect that if I go out of my way for someone (which I tend to do, a lot) that person will appreciate this act and me forever. Unfortunately, some people will take your kindness and treat it like a God given right and you can do very little to make them appreciate you.
So there you have it, a chunk of me that I dislike slightly and is no out there. Please feel free to share something about you. I would live to give it a read. Enjoy the video and have a lovely Monday!